Parenting and Adoption Options


1. Evaluating Alternatives

Parenting and Adoption Options

Client’s Choice
After you evaluate your life situation, and some of the responsibilities that go with parenting, you may want to evaluate your options.

If you feel concern about the responsibilities involved with parenting you may either need more time and counsel to become better prepared, or you may decide that it would be best for both you and your baby to consider other options such as:

  • Parenting your baby while living with a support person or persons
  • Shared parenting responsibilities with the baby’s father or other family members
  • Confidential adoption--the adoptive parents would care for the baby, with no contact between you and the baby
  • Semi-Open adoption--the adoptive parents care for the baby, giving you an opportunity to stay in contact without full disclosure of identifying information (full names and addresses).
  • Open adoption--the adoptive parents care for the baby, giving you the ability to maintain contact with the baby in an on-going relationship.

The Care Net pamphlet “Before You Decide” gives a testimony of a mother who made the difficult decision to adopt.  These are her words.  “Since I could not provide what we needed, the best decision I ever made was to find a loving adoptive family to raise my daughter.  She loves her family and loves me too.  I didn’t give her up, I gave her more.”  Donna

Referrals
(Only Christian adoption agencies approved by the Executive Director will be entered and given to the client)

Baby Moses/Safe Haven Law
If you feel overwhelmed after the birth of your child, the State of Texas has put in place a law that helps protect your baby and offers an alternative to parenting. You should know that, if you choose to have your baby and find yourself weighed down by the job of being a parent, Texas has the “Baby Moses Safe Haven” law.  The law allows you or the baby’s father to leave a baby under 60 days old in a safe place and not return for the baby without fear of being charged with a crime, if the baby is not hurt.  Safe places are hospitals, fire stations, emergency clinics or licensed child-placing agencies.

Talk to someone if you feel weighed down about being a parent.  There is help available and it is never too late.

2. Exploring Adoption

General Guidelines
The first objective of The Center’s counselors is to help the client choose life for her unborn child.  Only after
firmly choosing life, should adoption be introduced as an option.  If presented too soon, it could cause them
to lean toward abortion.  When discussing adoption, clearly state that The Center is not an adoption agency
and does not act as one.

  • The Center recognizes the validity of adoption as an alternative to abortion, but we
    are not biased toward adoption when compared to the other life-saving alternatives
  • The Center operates independent of adoption agencies
  • The Center receives no payment of any kind from these agencies
  • The Center does not enter into contractual relationships with adoption agencies
  • The Center does not share office space with adoption agencies
  • The Center gives referrals to adoption agencies, at client’s request, as to any other resource
  • The Center does not initiate or facilitate independent adoptions
  • The Center does not keep resumes of prospective adoptive families
  • The Center employees or volunteers may not under any circumstance adopt a child from a client

Common Questions and Answers about Adoption

What is Adoption?

  • Adoption is the loving act of biological parents (birth parents) who choose a family to nurture and care for their child
  • Adoption is bond created through the love that birth parents and adoptive parents share for their child
  • Adoption is not selfish or irresponsible; rather, it involves birth parents and adoptive parents working together to make a plan that is in the best interest of a child.
  • Adoption is not foster care.  Instead adoption provides your child with parents who are better able to emotionally and financially support a child.

Will the adoptive parents take good care of my baby?

  • You will have the security of knowing the parents you choose have proven their ability to provide an exceptional home for your child.

What can adoption offer me?

  • The choice of adoptive family
  • A flexible plan which you control
  • Meeting(s) with the adoptive family
  • An exchange of information through the years
  • Assistance with pregnancy-related necessities
  • Access to an experienced legal department
  • Housing assistance
  • Excellent medical providers
  • Educational and career planning
  • Emotional support throughout your pregnancy and beyond

What can adoption offer my child?

  • A mother and father
  • The love and security of adoptive parents who are emotionally and financially ready to parent.
  • The kind of home and family life that you want for your child.
  • The opportunity to fulfill the dreams you have for your child – dreams that take time, money and commitment.

When I think of the baby I place for adoption, how might I feel?

  • Love for your child
  • Sadness of saying goodbye
  • Peace that comes with knowing you made the right decision for you and your child.
  • Though the grief felt when saying good-bye is very real, strength and comfort come through the knowledge that you have given your child a life of wonderful opportunities.

How do I know that I won’t regret the decision of making an adoption plan for my baby?
Making an adoption plan for your baby is a tough decision, probably the toughest decision you’ll ever have to make.  And there are no guarantees that with this plan, or any major life decision, will be without regrets.  But what is most important is that you not lose sight of what’s best for you and your baby, now and in the future.